hey december

i've been gone for over a month! here's an attempt to change that. i'll definitely be blogging more here after finals are through. yesterday i got a new camera, and i'm SO excited. that's probably an understatement. here's some pictures from my morning.

it was 38 degrees outside this morning when i woke up! that's the coldest it's been all season. i'm happy.

black on black on black today.

caregiver - memoryhouse

currently on repeat.

happy.

oh how i wish i could've captured that moment on film. i don't think my words are enough, either. i've been searching for a picture to accompany this post, but nothing quite cuts it like it should. this'll have to do.

i drove to your house. it was raining moderately outside, and we went out to go get sushi for dinner. to go. we waited in the restaurant and watched the fish in the aquarium dart back and forth. we went back in my car, and i drove us back. you had your arm around me as i drove. we were stopped at a light, and i looked over at you and you looked at me, and a smile unfolded on both of our faces. a quiet, earnest smile.

for as long as i can remember, i haven't been able to just smile at someone like that and have them smile back at me. i always end up laughing. and i know we've both smiled at each other like that before, but it's just the fact that we can.
i've never loved anyone like i love you.

there are just some moments i wish i could have captured on film. but maybe there are some moments too beautiful to be captured by anything but our hearts.


12 fingers - young the giant
"your heart beats just like i wanted it to, and you want it too."


where i thought i met the angels - the tallest man on earth
i came across this song today. the guitar is perfect for quiet nights and reminiscing.


photo by sarak hellas.

missing manhattan

i keep missing manhattan more and more.

today in church i kind of zoned out and realized how close i am to everything.

for the first time, i felt like i could touch it. for the first time.

got a little flame in my heart now telling me i'm not going back.

i mean- the notion of living in NYC has always been a HUGE driving force in my life, but today i feel like it's hell bent and absolutely nothing can stop me now.

this post is probably a little bit too personal for me to be putting it up online. but, whatever.

everything is so exciting right now.

this week: studying, studying, lecture, test, practicum, careplans, last clinical :(

next week: studying, studying, studying, IAMDONALD (!!!!!!!!), last lecture, practicum

third week: studying, studying, studying, studying my face off, FINAL, studying, HESI

then break! i'm stressed, but it feels good. i think i'm more excited than stressed.

ready to start - arcade fire

finally got into them last night, i'm happy i did. i like the suburbs a lot.


first and last picture by joshua sinn, second by damien polegato, third by dave knapik.

not going back

 

i don't think i can even begin to elaborate on how much i love donald glover/childish gambino.

all of his stuff goes so hard. it takes my heart and twists it and rings it out and tells me to get back up and fuck whatever made me this way, cause i'm better than that now. 

and then leaves me aching for more.

it makes me appreciate music.

and makes me appreciate hard work and inspires me to keep going.

keep going, keep going, keep going. 

have fun, but keep going.

"i refuse to go back to not liking who i was"

gif by the lovely gracie, second photo by kevin rank. 

video is from CG's impromptu show at chandler's steakhouse last night in boise, idaho.

ready for summer

i see you shine in your way,

go on, go on, go on.

giving up the gun - vampire weekend

first photo by brian ferry.

poindexter

feeling a little like a badass today style-wise, which is funny because i spent my entire day in scrubs and/or my bed. (okay definitely not with scrubs and in my bed, that's terrible)

today i hung and spiked my first IV bag!

i also thrifted a pair of gap khakis and a pair of levi 517s. the latter, i'm turning into some cutoffs.

as far as other things go - okay who am i kidding, there's always a little CG love in every blog post nowadays - i just downloaded poindexter and i'm really liking it so far. a little ashamed to be admitting that i just downloaded it, but there you go. 

grind - childish gambino
definitely fell in love with this within the first 15 seconds.

dress from rachel antonoff

donald glover

how much do i love donald glover? a lot. the answer is a lot.

had a dream last night that started somewhere in the middle of me walking with him backstage after one of his performances and we were just kind of talking and smiling and being cute and whatever. people were around us but they didn't notice (or mind). i was wearing some sort of strapless wrap dress and at one point he put his (leopard print, i kid you not. dreams are weird.) jacket around me. ONLY IN MY DREAMS.

all of a sudden he's turning to go up a stairwell and i'm following him and then alison brie (as annie edison in this dream) is jealously pleading me to not get with him or something like that. donald tells me to go into his dressing room to wait for him. next thing I know, i'm in his dressing room. i wonder what's in his jacket pockets. right pocket: receipt from some expensive clothing store. left pocket: a weird retractable pencil, small paintbrushes, and bacon. 

bacon.

wake up, gabby.

woke up with this in my head.

i love clothes (deadbeat summer) - childish gambino
i usually wake up with a song already playing in my head. one of life's little pleasures.

top photo is by lauren marek. bottom photo is from band of outsiders ss2010, found via.

eyes

wipe the sun out of my eyes. 

i've been struggling with my faith, a lot more lately than usual. usually it was just something i would push aside, but i don't think i want that anymore. 

i'm trying. 

we all try - frank ocean
can honestly say that this song has changed something deep in my heart, not only musically, but through the message also.
mad props to andrew for introducing me to frank ocean, sporadically one day.

thank you jackie for taking this picture even though i still feel weird being the subject of them.

2010 recap

2010 has been a good, solid year. But it's been a really great year in all actuality. I have a few reasons.

1. school
2. Teen Dream
3. style
4. everything

goodbye november

photographers unknown

This morning I woke up to a partially opened window, an uninterrupted blue sky, unlimited sun, and a nice cold breeze coming through. I watched the first few minutes of my day unfold underneath my blankets. To me, there is nothing like it in comparison. I reached to play some William Fitzsimmons, and it made everything perfect.

Had some peach yogurt and pistachios for breakfast, and now I'm off to drop off some film and see what I can find at Hobby Lobby. All things I should not be doing the day before a test. Oh, my stomach is churning already. I did get one chapter read though, last night.

photo source

All I want is to take lovely food pictures like this. Right now, at least. Getting slightly tired of my gritty D40. Time to upgrade probably. One day, one day.

starting a new thing

I'm annoyed with Tumblr at the moment. So I made this. Dumb excuse but I've been meaning to actually blog somewhere for a while. I've got a killer headache (heh, hence vasodilation) probably from the root beer I just had a few sips of - a rush of sugar to the head - but I've also got a killer braid on my head.

Excuse my inability to take pictures of myself. I apparently can't use my digital properly anymore. Too irritable to try again anyway. My bangs are growing out and they're past the awkward phase where I have to decide if I want to trim them or not. I've been too preoccupied with school to trim them, so they're a'growin. Easier to braid anyway.

old navy cardigan, banana republic cardigan, ratty t-shirt

Cardigans, oh cardigans. I wore the green one today and took photos of Frances. Afterwards, we got coffee and tried at all costs to avoid people that we know.

Last night while listening to Last.fm, I discovered William Fitzsimmons. Today I downloaded his first album, Until When We Are Ghosts, and I'm just so in love I was on the verge of tears with the first listen through. But my headache is so bad I can't even tolerate music right now. I guess I've just been eating so healthily lately that the root beer just completely messed with my blood glucose levels. Oh and I didn't even get to work out tonight. Bummer.

Hopefully I can finally stick to this thing and not bounce around like the fleeting, fickle gemini that I am.